A recent meeting occurred at a school; the attendees were to be the parents, the teenage student, and the student’s school housemaster. Neither father nor mother could attend (the short notice) so the stepfather attended instead.
The purpose of the meeting? To set clear goals for the student for 2010.
The student politely and firmly stated he wasn’t interested.
This rendered the meeting into a general conversation bordering on the farcical.
The problem?
The student felt he was there at the behest of others, not himself.
The goals were being set for him, not with him
The lad is at that age where he asks “why”, challenges everything, wants, or in fact demands, explanations. Most of all, he wants consistent conduct from his elders.
This teenage boy notices the double standards very quickly.
The point
Children, especially teenagers, are insightful enough to see when we adults behave in a manner, contrary to what we say.
This means, that when we appear to be inconsistent (in their eyes), either rightly or wrongly, we may be asked to explain our conduct to our children.
Let us at least be open in our conversations with our children and take their observations as an example of love and their genuine interest in us and what we do.
That conversation, where we may feel challenged, may be just the one that inspires them (and us) to new heights!
